How to run a Marathon : 10 Practical Tips

First Things First: Wish you and your loved ones a very  happy, peppy and zappy 366 days in 2012

Looks Good Right? But Do You Know that he is not following some of the Golden Rules?

As you might be aware, I have been preparing for a marathon(half). Due my extreme commitment in the preparations I decided to change my category from 25 to 12.5 KM so that the regular winners of 25 k are not disheartened by their sudden loss. But as 12.5 KM is not my category, I knew I could not finish first. But life is full of sacrifices ain't it? While running the marathon, I picked up some tips and came to know that most of my "training" didn't incorporate the important stuff that contributes to better and efficient running.

These are my observations and are awaiting patent. Humble as I am, I hate to say it but I am expecting a Nobel prize in Sports. Till then I hope you keep these things between us. Here are ten tips that will help you for sure whether you are over prepared or under prepared.

TIP #1: Bigger the Belly, the Better

Point No:1

The above diagram is self explanatory. Here vertical velocity does no come into play as the device is fixed to your body and bounces back. So Vertical velocity gets cancelled on a whole. The horizontal velocity propels you forward giving you a one sided advantage over no-belly runners.

Ever heard an advise saying strengthen your core muscles blah blah blah ? Follow that if you want  you lose out on valuable momentum and horizontal velocity gained by having a good sizable belly.

Point No 2: Girls love teddy bears. Teddy bears are cute. Ask Yourself, have you ever seen a teddy bear with six packs?

TIP #2: Always smile for the photographer  and run hard when he's around

TIP#2 Demonstration

See what I did there. Brilliant Stuff! Proof of my running skills and Bragging rights for life eternal!!

TIP #3: ALWAYS - choose a marathon with loads of food 

A fully loaded food stall far ahead in the hazy mist - talk about motivation. There are few better motivators than FOOD. It will give your timings an extra boost.

TIP #4: Wear a hat or a headband

This is a tip you will get from no other expert. This has been put down from my thorough observations. 90% of the guys/gals who finished in the top three had a head band or cap. How it helps you is a mystery. Does it do anything better than keeping your sweat at bay? Scientists are currently working on an answer in my top secret laboratory in the Thar desert. I am giving away too much of secret information nowadays, no?

TIP #5: Target the "Fatter" Guy

Its a well known tip. I, myself have followed this technique from my school years. There will be some fatter guys who will give you a run for your money, but always remember that there are enough lazy people in the world and half of them turn up at a marathon.

TIP #6: This carbohydrate diet that people suggest is utter crap

 I was on a heavy carbohydrate diet for one week hoping all the stored away energy will come back to me when running. And what happened? I  managed to add a spare tire onto my tummy. It did help me with Tip #1 . Hey, may be that is the whole idea. Eureka!

TIP #7:  Pee before the whistle
That is unless you want to display your trajectory skills (applicable only for male runners) picked up at school to a horde of people running by. 

I guess, female runners will have an excruciating wait till a set of those portable loo cabins come up.

TIP #8: Have a different name on you bib
This way you maintain your identity a secret in times of shameless defeat.

TIP #9 : Ice blocks at the finish are for your legs 
No they don't serve spirits at the finish and its absolutely not to make your water colder.

TIP #10 : ALERT: The guy you overtake happily might have already finished
When you overtake that loser walking leisurely and clicking pictures, BEWARE. It can only mean two things - either that he has already finished before you which invariably makes you the loser or that he might be from the photo crew which invariably makes you an idiot to think he is a runner.

HAPPY RUNNING FOLKS!